


Humanz

by HeavenlyHunny, SDPHNS (HeavenlyHunny)



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: AU, also strap in folks this is gonna be a long one, welcome to the band being all chaotic and existential
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-11-11
Packaged: 2021-01-15 17:35:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21257048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavenlyHunny/pseuds/HeavenlyHunny, https://archiveofourown.org/users/HeavenlyHunny/pseuds/SDPHNS
Summary: Ok but like I just really wanted to write a Gorillaz fic where the characters go through a portal and end up in the real world and Damon and Jamie keep trying to catch them and make them go back and they’re just like “nah fam, get recked”. Still hopefully a good read tho





	1. O Green World

**Author's Note:**

> This was born from a random off hand thought I had while scrolling through tumblr. I started writing for fun and the whole thing ended up way more detailed than I though it would. It’s not the best writing in the world, of course not cause it’s me, but I’ve had quite a bit of fun doing it. Enjoy kidz 👍

Something was off. He could sense it, but the others couldn’t seem to. And since he often missed things the others caught, he didn’t think too much of it. Try as he might, his brain couldn’t seem to wrap itself around too many things. Murdoc always said it was either the drugs or the head trauma...or both. 

Either way he wrote off his odd feeling as a side effect of something and tried to focus back on counting the number of bubbles in the milk of his cereal bowl. 

“You okay, D?” Russel asked, eyebrow raised, peering over his newspaper. 

“Yeah, I’m alright,” he mumbled in reply, still not able to fully ignore, or identify, the strange sensation. 

Russel simply hummed and turned his attention back to whatever he’d been reading at the time. 2D looked up at him and frowned. 

“You know you always ask that, right?” 2D questioned.

“Ask what?” Russel replied, finally lowering his paper.

“Ask me how I’m doing. You ask it every single mornin’,” the singer explained. 

Russel frowned. 

“Yeah, just common courtesy, I guess,” Russel answered, speaking slowly, still not understanding the other man’s issue.

“Yeah, but you ask it at the same time everyday,” he pressed. 

“Look man, I’m not following,” Russel sighed, rubbing his temples as he usually did when 2D spoke for too long. 

“It’s the same everyday. I’m always sittin’ ‘ere  
eatin’ my breakfast. You’re always reading the paper, and she always on her phone,” the man jabbed his thumb towards Noodle sitting across from him. 

She looked up from her device, cocking her head to the side in confusion as she often did as a child. 

2D huffed, not wanting to look stupid as usual, but the odd feeling was too strong for him not to mention. 

“And Muds comes in and calls us nobs and gets his beer from the fridge. Then he spills it and makes me clean it up,” he continued, honestly impressed with this own memory of their routine. He usually couldn’t remember anything that well. 

As if on cue, grunting noises made themselves audible just as Murdoc entered the kitchen. 

“You three nobs are always up too early,” he growled, shuffling his way into the room stiffly. 

“It’s 9:30,” Noodle mumbled. 

“Yeah well-“ Murdoc stooped.

The fridge door hung open and revealed the bare shelves. It was uncommon for there to be no food, but no beer was a new sight. 

Murdoc stood frozen for a minute, almost as if he had no knowledge of what to do next. 

“I uh, there’s....” he stuttered out in confusion. 

“See! I knew somefin’ was up!” 2D exclaimed. A weight felt as if it was lifted off his brain. 

“What are you on about, faceache?” Murdoc growled and narrowed his eyes at the younger man, “what did you do with my beer?”

“No, that’s it! I knew somefin’ was dif’rent bout today,” 2D answered, “we always do the same fings the same way everyday, but today feels...dif’rent.”

“We didn’t know what he meant at first, but he’s right. It does kinda seem like we’re stuck in a loop, almost,” Noodle chimed in, standing up to peer into the empty fridge herself. 

2D grinned, feeling validated in his curiosity for the first time. Murdoc still didn’t seem impressed. 

“So what? We do the same things, yeah. I don’t see the problem with it,” Murdoc grumbled, rolling his eyes, “You know what they say. Variety is the spice of life....and I for one am not a fan of spicy foods, my dear.”

“Not surprising,” Russel mumbled under his breath. 

“Yes, but it is a bit concerning, don’t you think?” Noodle asked. 

“Might I remind you all that we’re cartoon characters,” Murdoc added, sounding annoyed with the sudden questioning, “we do stuff when that Hewlet bloke decides we do. Til’ then I say we quit complaining and enjoy our vacation of sorts, yeah?” 

“But why do we have to wait for him to draw us doin’ stuff?” 2D whined, “why can’t we just go do it?”

“Same reason you can’t grow a working brain,” the bassist chuckled, putting a taunting hand on 2D’s shoulder, “just not how the world works.”

“Well yeah, but who says it can’t work the way D says?” Noodle asked, starting to feel somewhat of an odd sensation herself. 

“You’ve got a point there,” Russel agreed, “I guess we could...try and go out and do something. Although I don’t even know where we’d go or what we’d do.”

“We’ll think of something, I guess,” Noodle offered with a shrug. 

“Hey hey hey,” Murdoc said, drawing out his words in attempt to slow their actions, “don’t be all drastic now. And since when did I decide for us to go anywhere?”

“You didn’t, we voted just now and it’s three to one,” Noodle said simply. 

“I’m sorry, since when was MY band a democracy?” Murdoc growled. 

“Well if we’re doing things different, since just now,” Russel said, “you’ve been outvoted, man.”

“Oh isn’t this wonderful,” the bassist huffed in annoyance. 

He peered over at 2D, who seemed to be both intensely focused and staring off into space at the same time. 

“Well brainache, this your revolution you’ve started. Why don’t you decide where we’re supposed to just mosey on down to?” Murdoc growled at him. 

2D didn’t seem to hear what the older man said. 

“Umm...earth to 2D...you okay man?” Russel asked 

“Do you hear that?” 2D asked curiously. The poor man seemed to be doing his best to make his, usually scattered, brain focus. 

“Hear what?”

“Listen.”

“I don’t know what you’ve smoked recently kid, but you seem to be the only one hearing something out of the ordinary,” Murdoc said, interrupting the long, awkward silence that had befallen them. 

“It’s like a low hummin’ sound,” 2D insisted, “I fink it’s comin’ from the attic.”

“Since when did we have an attic?” Murdoc asked curiously, his head tilting up. 

“I assume since we moved in, Murdoc,” Noodle sighed, “things don’t just appear out of no where .”

“I can hear it! It’s getting louder!” 2D yelled suddenly, making the others jump, and ran up the stairs. 

“D! Wait!” 

“You better not break anything! I just found out about the fucking place and I already plan to make it my personal den!”

The other three band members did their best to keep up with the surprisingly fast singer, eventually running into him at the bottom of a staircase that seemed to have appeared out of thin air. 

“Okay, this definitely wasn’t here before,” Noodle commented, “it’s in the middle of our hallway.”

“What do we do now?” Russel asked 

“What do you mean? We’re clearly way too invested to just call if fuckin’ quits,” Murdoc groaned out. 

“If I remember these last few minutes correctly Muds, you were the one against this,” Russel sighed, “but fine. D, you go first. 

Any other day and 2D would’ve protested and stood shivering at the bottom of the staircase, but something was drawing him towards it. Whatever “it” was. 

He shuffled his way up the stairs with the others following close behind him. The attic was large and was surprisingly heavily furnished, despite the fact that none of them had ever entered it before. 

However, none of them had time to truly take notice of any of this, since one obvious occurrence easily captured all of their attention. 

“What is that?” Noodle asked, half curious and half terrified. 

On the opposite side of the room was a large glowing mass of what could’ve been electricity...or maybe light, hovering just above the ground. 

“I don’t know,” Russel admitted, approaching the thing slowly and cautiously, “but it doesn’t look too...friendly.”

“I haven’t seen something like that since I opened that portal to hell back at the old Kong...good times,” Murdoc added. He seemed to be trying his best to stay cool, even though he too seemed quite taken aback by its presence. 

“What do we do with it?” Noodle asked, turning her attention away from it and towards Russel. 

“I’m not sure, but I don’t think we should get to close to it.”

However, the drummer’s words seemed to go in one of 2D’s ears and out the other, and not in the way things usually did. 

He felt to entranced by the thing. He didn’t know why, but he felt attracted to it, like he was meant to go towards it. 

“D, I uh...wouldn’t do that if I were you,” Murdoc admitted, his own nervousness becoming apparent. 

The blue haired man was standing right in front of it now. He squinted, trying to see if he could make out anything on the other side. 

“Come on then,” he said simply, turning to look at his band mates for a brief second, before reaching his hand into the portal. 

He brought it back out quickly, checking to see if anything about it seemed different. 

Everything seemed normal. Except the man’s behavior, which was why his band mates continued standing a few feet back, wondering where this sudden boldness had come from. 

The singer shrugged, letting go of any remaining hesitations, before stepping into the light.


	2. People

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This took way longer than I was expecting it to, but then again my college work got hella stressful out of no where so that didn’t help either. Nevertheless, here we are...

The fall wasn’t long...but it was hard. 2D groaned as he blinked his eyes open. He sat up weakly and surveyed his surroundings. 

He seemed to be in an office of some kind. Er, no...a recording studio?

Both, it seemed. 

He got to his feet, his legs shakily attempting to gain their balance. He looked around the room once more. It seemed new and familiar at the same time. 

If he had seen it before, he could definitely see it much better now. He blinked a couple times, realizing his vision seemed much clearer now. 

He took a few steps forward. Looking at the walls once more, he realized that it was in fact pictures of the band that decorated much of the room. 

Turning around he even realized that this side of the portal he’d come out of, was actually a picture of his own face. An old one at that, probably from their first album. 

“Woah,” he said to himself, audibly. 

Just as he turned to travel to another part of the room, a light appeared on the poster and Murdoc came tumbling into the room, landing face first one the ground. 

“Bloody hell,” the older man groaned, standing up quicker than 2D had, “What the-“

The bassist took in his surroundings. It clicked much faster for him than it had for 2D where they must be. Although it was 2D himself that caught his attention the most. 

The other man had always been taller than him on paper, but it never felt much like it until that moment. It was only about 4 inches, but Murdoc, angrily, noted that the singer seemed to tower over him. 

And then there was his eyes. 

“I’m guessing your eyesight must be a bit better out here,” the older man commented, peering up at him. 

“Yeah, how can you tell?” 

“They’re not as...fucked up, I guess? There’s bruises ‘round them, but they look bloodshot at worst. And I can see your actual pupils and not just a fuckin black abyss,” Murdoc explained. 

“Ohh...” 2D said, obviously still trying to wrap his mind around it, “well you look, um...less green?”

It was true. The bassist peered over into a mirror hanging on the opposite wall, seeing his own skin which looked a much lighter shade of green, closer to the white 2D’d always assumed it was meant to be. 

“Hmm, well this isn’t half bad,” the man said smirking. He opened his mouth allowing his tongue to stretch out. To 2D’s disdain, it seemed much longer now, almost reaching the opposite side of the room. 

“Hey, Muds?”

“What?”

“Where are we exactly?” 

“We’re in Hewlet and Albarn’s studio.”

Before 2D could answer, the poster lit up once more. This time Noodle entered, landing on her feet unlike the other two. 

“Why’ve we never been here before?” 2D asked curiously. 

“Because we’re cartoons, D,” Murdoc explained, watching as Noodle stared wide eyed at the walls, “and this is the “real world”, if you will.”

“This is insane,” Noodle whispered to herself. 

“What’s insane is you three insisting on falling out of that thing,” Russel said as he walked into the room. He’d come through the main door to their right. 

“How’d you get in through there?!” Murdoc asked, shocked and annoyed that he hadn’t had the option to do so. 

“You three all jumped into the portal thing. I just kinda walk in causally and I got dropped off outside the room,” Russel explained. 

“Woah, we all kinda look different,” 2D commented, making Murdoc wonder if their new world had somehow caused his brain shrink even smaller than it already was. 

“So this is where Jamie and Damon work?” Russel commented, taking his own glimpse around the room. 

“I guess so,” Noodle answered, although she seemed distracted by a guitar in the corner that’d caught her attention. 

Murdoc watched the others explore the room, before something at the other side of it caught his eye. 

He peered over his should once as he shuffled his way to the slightly ajar door. Stepping through it, he immediately noted that it must’ve been once of the two men’s personal office. A large desk was in the middle, completely cluttered with papers, and the rest of the small room was quite barren. Leaning in closer Murdoc made out an older picture of a young girl with brown hair. 

“Must be Albarn’s,” the bassist commented to himself aloud. 

He circled behind the desk and plopped down into the chair. Spinning around in it, he peered out of the window, realizing they were quite a few stories up. He had to say, he enjoyed the feeling of being that high up, looking down on other. He felt like a god. 

He turned back around to face the desk, a piece of paper in particular calling his attention. It was stick out of one of the locked sections of the desk, but from the corner he could see, he knew it was money related. 

He cleverly thought to stick his, oddly long, nail in the lock and, sure enough, the drawer opened revealing a large crate filled with everything from bills to checkbooks to pay stubs to bank statements. He snatched up the paper that he’d originally seen, skimming it over. His eyes wide as the sky once he’d reached the bottom. 

The door creaked open, revealing his smiling bandmates. 

“Muds, you won’t believe it! We found some really cool stuff in there!” 2D sang happily. He was clutching a small melodica in his hands. 

The other two also seemed to have found something of interest, Russel holding a rolled up poster of the band and Noodle running her thumb over an old lyric sheet for El Mañana. 

“Can’t believe they have all this stuff all related to us,” Russel said. 

“Do you fink we could some of it back with us?” 2D asked gleefully, his eyes wide up with hope. 

“Back? Ohh we’re not going back,” Murdoc chuckled. 

“Oh...well, yeah I guess we could explore some more before we do, if everyone’s up for it.”

“No Dents, I mean we’re not going back, EVER.”

“Uh...what?” Noodle asked. 

“Yeah man, weren’t you the one who was against this to begin with?” Russel added. 

“Hey hey, don’t you all get your knickers in a bunch before I’ve even started explaining’. Now, would you all like to see why we’re not going back?”

They nodded. 

Murdoc turned the paper he’d been reading so they could read it. 

“This, my friends, is why.”

“What is it?” 2D questioned. 

“This is the amount of money Albarn made from ticket sales for just ONE of his shows for the Now Now tour.”

“Woah,” the three said in unison, all squinting towards the paper. 

“And that’s just one show. Think of what he probably made from the whole tour, or any of the others tours, and let’s not forget albums sales, merch sales, and anything else they’ve made money off of with our faces on it!”

“That is a lot Muds,” Russel agreed, “but what are we supposed to do with it?”

“What do you mean what are we gonna do?! We’re going to get back what’s rightfully ours. It’s us on those blasted tracks to begin with!”

“Well, actually-“

“It’s us!” Murdoc snapped, before collecting himself, “look, think about it this way. We’re living in a rundown house filled with sodding spirits flying everywhere and they’re both probably living quite well off of OUR money.”

“I hate to say it, but he does have a point,” Noodle sighed, “maybe we should go talk to them about it. They’re probably in the office some where.”

“No no no, we can’t do that,” Murdoc interjected quickly, “those selfish pricks will try and keep everything for themselves.”

“Well what do you suggest we do, then?” Russel asked, crossing his arms. 

“Well for the time being we keep enjoying ourselves. This building is quite big and we’ve just seen the one room, imagine what the rest is like,” the bassist said. The familiar glint in his eye whenever he planned to do something not so legal, “after the building closes then we’ll have our real fun.”

Although none of the three of them trusted the older man, they couldn’t help their own curiosity in exploring the rest of the building. So they all bit their tongues and shuffled their way out of the room and into the long hallway. 

Noodle sped off in her own direction and, having lived the woman for several decades by then, the men knew to leave her be. The three of them began to walk in the opposite direction, admiring the various Gorillaz decor that graced the walls of the long hallway. 

“Man this place is huge.” 

“I found a map of the whole place in Albarn’s office. I’ve already picked out the room where I’ll put my Murdoc Mancave.”

“Geez man, not again. This isn’t even our building! It’s Damon and Jamie’s. We can’t change anything here.”

“It’s theirs for now, but trust me if every thing goes as I have planned it’ll be our own personal studio in no time.”

“What is this whole plan of yours anyways?” Russel pressed on, becoming increasingly more concerned with his bandmates ambitions, which was of course not something he wasn’t used to. 

“Oh don’t worry yourself Russ. This is the real world, we should be indulging ourselves in it. Leave all the dirty work to me, yeah? Besides, when have I ever steered us wrong mate?”

“Plenty of times. I can think of at least 30 in the last year.”

The bassist rounded in front of the larger man, leaning against the wall in front of him and flashing his signature smirk. Russel already knew this wasn’t a good sign. 

“Being the mastermind I am, I have quite an elaborate plan already so I won’t go into every tiny detail with you, but if you need enough to put your mind at ease, I plan on ransacking the place after closing.”

“And what exactly are you planning on stealing?”

“Anything we need really. I saw lyrics written on a napkin in Damon’s office so I know he’s working on a new album. Just need to find where he keeps the demos, pack up as much equipment of his as we can, and snag as many items we think will get us a good amount of pounds if we can and then we’re on our way.”

“Alright then Mr. Mastermind, tell me this. Where are we going to take all of this stuff? If you haven’t already noticed we aren’t exactly from here. Yeah it’s England, but not OUR England. We don’t have a house. Hell, we don’t even have a car to load everything in!”

“Ugh, see why I don’t tell you things mate? Your working yourself up already. I have all of that figured out.”

“Look man, all I know is I’m the only one in this band with a clean record and I don’t intend on getting caught and messing that up. Especially not after we just got here.”

“Oh whatever, you’ll be fine Russ. Geez why can’t you be a bit more complacent, like 2D-“

The realization hit both men at the same time. They looked around frantically for the missing singer. 

“Lord we’ve only been out here ten minutes and we’ve already lost him!” Murdoc huffed. He peaked his head into doorways they’d passed on the long stretch while Russel looked around to the next corridor. 

“No sign of him!” The drummer called out. 

Murdoc opened his mouth to give their next direction but was interrupted by a loud crash and a familiar high pitched yelp coming from another part of the building. 

“I swear he’s like a kindergartener. Can’t leave him alone for 5 minutes without him breaking something...or himself,” the bassist growled as he and Russel followed in the direction of the noise. 

Sure enough there was their singer sprawled out at the bottom of a staircase. As they descended, the two men surveyed the busy first floor of the office. In contrast to the quietness of the second floor, the bottom floor was full of bustle and noise. People walked about nearly bumping into each other and all wearing a similar scowls. Russel noted Murdoc’s smirk as a woman in a small dress caught his eye. 

“You okay D?” He asked, helping him up with his large arm. 

“Yeah I’m fine. I was just walking around and I found the new floor...but I forgot to walk down the stairs.”

“Proves your brain is just as small no matter what world you’re in,” Murdoc groaned. 

“Are you going to clean that up?” A not so pleasant voice asked from behind them. 

The woman Murdoc had eyed earlier was standing, arms crossed and brown hair swinging above her shoulders, by a tray of spilled food, clearly caused by 2D’s fall. Next to it was a cup of coffee that hadn’t spilled but was now filled bits of dirt and hair. 

“Excuse our friend here ma’am, we’ll get you some new food,” Russel apologize. 

“Don’t bother,” the woman rolled her eyes and gestured to the spilled food, “just clean it up will you? I don’t want ants around my fucking desk.”

“Look here lady, do you know who we-“

“Leave it Muds,” Russel interrupted, reaching to toss a bagel into the trash bin, lowering his voice, “besides if we’re planning on robbing the place we might not want to make ourselves known around the office.”

The older man grumbled but complied and kept quiet, although still refusing to help with the cleaning. 

Russel noticed after a while that he was the only one doing so, looking back to see 2D busying himself flirting with a red haired woman. He sighed, reaching to toss out the coffee cup before it was snatched from his hands by brunette woman. 

“You’re gonna keep that?” Russel asked. 

“Eh nothing spilled. And I don’t care if my boss likes it. He’s a dick.” 

The drummer, after saying a silent prayer for whatever poor soul would end up with that coffee, turned around to see Murdoc pulling 2D away from the red head. 

“Aw Muds I was having a nice talk wif her,” the blue haired man pouted, “she said she liked my costume.”

“You’re not wearing one, dullard. She thinks your dressed up as 2D.”

“But...I am 2D...least I fink so. How am I supposed to dress up as myself?”

“That’s the point, faceache.”

“Look you two, we’re already calling too much attention to ourselves. I say we find Noodle and lay low until this place closes,” Russel said. 

“I’m right here,” Noodle called out, skipping her way down the stairs towards her bandmates, “there’s a back door of the studio that leads out to the car park. We can park a car near the exit and shuffle everything we take out through there.”

“How did you even know Mudz was planning on stealing anything?”

“Huh? I thought that was obvious. Whenever Murdoc says he has a plan it’s either stealing something or getting drunk...or both.”

“I’ve raised you well,” Murdoc chuckled, ruffling the woman’s hair. 

“I can’t believe Damon and Jamie have all these people working here,” the woman commented as she smacked Murdoc’s hand away. 

“I know, man. All of this just for Gorillaz,” Russel agreed. 

“Of course they do, we can’t have a small little pit crew for the biggest band in the world,” Murdoc bragged. 

“Well it isn’t even our crew. It’s Damon and Jamie’s.”

“It will be soon. If all goes well tonight we’ll be the proud owners of this glorious establishment in no time,” Murdoc said, attempting to reassure his bandmates who, of course, had no faith in the man whatsoever. 

“I found a room upstairs that looks like people hardly go in it,” Noodle offered, “we can lay low there while we wait for it to close.”

“Thanks Noodle, I got us some food for the wait,” 2D cheered, walking towards them with an armful of crackers and mints from the coffee table.

“Good job, D,” Noodle sighed, patting his shoulder and turning on her heal with the three men following behind her up the stairs to their hiding place. 

*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•

“Seriously Damon, I’m trying to work, quit messing with it!”

“Messing with what?”

“However your making my drawing disappear. Stop it. I’ve got to finish it for the magazine cover.”

Damon gave Jamie a confused look, swallowing the bite he’d taken out of his sandwich. 

“I don’t know what you mean,” Damon said. 

“Every time I try and draw anything it disappears off the screen, see?” Jamie said, leaning over to show the other man his screen. 

Sure enough, any lines the artist tried to add to his previously started drawing would quickly erase themselves. 

“Well I’m sitting here next to you, so clearly I’m not the one doing it.”

“Well then who is?”

“How am I supposed to know?”

“This is your studio. Maybe you messed up something electrical.”

“You really think I’m the one sets up the electricity in the building?!”

Jamie opened his mouth to retort, but closed it as he turned his attention towards the unamused woman standing in the doorway. 

“Good morning, Cynthia,” he said, acting overly cheerful, partly to act as if the two hadn’t been bickering and part to try and engage the, usually uptight, woman. 

The woman didn’t reply, simply placing a coffee in front of Damon. She turned to look at Jamie in disgust before stomping out of the room. 

“You think you could find a secretary that doesn’t hate me?” Jamie asked once the woman was out of earshot. 

“Well, you have yet to find a business partner who doesn’t, so I think it’d be quite difficult,” Damon mumbled, taking a sip and wincing, “oh god, that’s awful.”

Jamie grabbed the cup, taking a few sips for himself and accidentally spilling some on desk keyboard by accident.

“You ever thought it could be glitching from you constantly spilling stuff on it?” Damon asked frowning. 

“Well it wouldn’t make a drawing just erase itself now, would it?”

“It’s rhetorical, Jamie,” Damon sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose, “just go on break or something. We can wait and call someone to come in after closing.”

“Yeah yeah, sounds good,” the other man answered absentmindedly as he attempted to clean the coffee from his keyboard. 

A head poked itself in the doorway. 

“Damon, the record company is on the phone,” Remi called into the room. 

“Shit,” Damon hissed, “I forgot about that. Tell them I’ll be there in a sec.”

“You really should hire a new secretary. Your coffee isn’t right and now your forcing Remi to take your calls for you,” Jamie chuckled. 

“Just...get that cleaned up will you?” Damon huffed, turning his back and heading out of the room. 

*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•*•

It had been a long day. 

The phone call with the record company had gone less than pleasantly and it had been far from a productive writing day. 

“Well doesn’t some one look just peachy,” Jamie commented on the other man’s disheveled appearance. 

“Look I would not be here if it weren’t for your glitching mess of a machine,” Damon retorted. 

“Where is the bloody electrician anyways?” Jamie checked his watch, glancing around impatiently. 

“I phoned him a good four hours ago. Got the confirmation number and all that. He should’ve been here by now.”

“Did you give him the right address?”

“No Jamie, we’ve been in this building for how many fucking years and I don’t know our address yet, of course I gave him the right one!”

“I only asked cause you’ve done it before.”

“I didn’t mess it up, I just typed a wrong number by mistake. There’s a difference.”

Jamie huffed out another retort, but his words went unheard by his partner as the loud sound of a crash echoed from upstairs. 

The two men briefly made eye contact before simultaneously glancing toward the upstairs of the office where the noise had come from. 

“Hello?” Damon called out twice. The noises continued, although noticeably quieter, but there was no response to his inquiry. 

The two men crept over to the stairs, moving as softly as they could as they traveled upward. They paused briefly at the top, but another loud crashing sound from the opposite end of the long hallway in front of them immediately set them in motion. 

It hit Damon at that moment that, with the office closed and mostly dark, there could very well be intruders with likely no hesitation on injuring him and Jamie. Nevertheless he was already almost there and his bad day kept him from really giving the issue any real concern. 

The end of the hall was even darker than the entrance, giving their situation a more ominous aura. 

“Hello? Is anyone there?” Damon repeated, intentionally ignoring the snicker from Jamie that followed it. He was not in the mood for another one of the man’s unnecessary mentions of songs he’d unintentionally quoted. 

“Door’s open,” Jamie said, gesturing to the door to their right that was slightly ajar despite the room itself being pitch black. 

The two men nodded at each other silently, Damon suddenly having a feeling of dread and picking up the closet thing he could in order to defend them as they walked in. 

“Oh great, they’re gonna point guns at us and you’re gonna defeat them with a pot plant.”

“Well it’s more than you had,” Damon retorted, peeping down at the item. 

Jamie rolled his eyes and pushed the door further open. He reached around it and flicked the light on. 

Thankfully the men weren’t greeted with killers, but they were face to face with a trashed studio.

“Oh...dear.” 

“Fucks sake!” Damon cried out, kicking the wall angrily and massaging his temples. 

“Well on the bright side I don’t see anything missing. It was probably just some bored teenagers with nothing better to do.”

“Yeah you’re probably right but that doesn’t change the fact that one of our recording rooms is-“

“Didn’t you have something there?”

“What?” Damon asked, thrown off by the other man’s interruption. 

Jamie point to a corner of the room that looked as if something had sat there previously. 

“I remember you having something there, yeah?”

Damon squinted at the area, trying to recall what sat there, his eyes going wide with realization when he remembered. 

“My demos!”

“You’re what?”

“My demos! They stole my bloody demos!”

“It’s fine. You make em on your iPad. You can still pull em up digitally.”

“No I can’t! I delete them once I transfer them over to the tapes, to save space.”

“What? Jeez Damon, what decade are you living in? Just by an SD card or something!”

“Well it’s not gonna help me get the ones I’ve been working on for the past YEAR back, is it?!”

The men were pulled out their argument by the sound of a closing door coming from down the hallway. 

“Well we’re not gonna get them back just standing here,” Jamie said, motioning for Damon to follow him as he himself followed the sound. 

“I don’t know who you are or why you’re doing this, but just know we won’t press charges if you give the tapes and anything else you stole back,” Damon called out, doing his best to be civil in the situation. 

The further they traveled down the hallway, sounds of rummaging became louder. 

And so did voices. 

“Hurry it up would you? It’ll be morning by the time you three knobs finish.”

“You could always help you know. It would makes things go a lot faster.”

“You expect a severely injured man to do grueling manual labor? Russ, I expected more from you.”

“You stubbed your toe on the bottom stair. I wouldn’t call that severely injured.”

Damon gave Jamie, who seemed genuinely amused, and unimpressed look. 

“You helped set all this up didn’t you?” Damon sighed, feeling too tired to even be annoyed. 

“I didn’t set up anything. They decided to do it on there own I guess,” Jamie said snickering, still very entertained by what he assumed was a joke from their friends. 

“Phil! Remi! It’s not funny and I need my demos back,” Damon called out. 

The voices immediately quieted after Damon spoke, he and Jamie’s footsteps being the only audible noise. 

“Remi...Phil?” Damon called out again. 

Something made him feel uneasy. He exchanged a look with Jamie, who he could also tell was quite confused. Just as the two men prepared to round the corner, they heard back door slam and another voice call out from below. 

“We finished loading everyfing up!” 

Jamie and Damon stopped in their tracks. 

“Why is Nelson here?” Jamie whispered to him. They hadn’t heard from the other man in a couple years. 

“Ah come on, D!”

“Can’t even keep your mouth shut!”

“What? What did I do!” 

Damon stepped around Jamie, finally having had enough of whoever was messing with them, and followed the sounds to the top of the stairs. He surveyed the area quickly, not catching sight of anything suspicious until...

“Geez Albarn, who spit in your coffee this morning?” 

Damon turned his head and saw the owner of the voice. His body froze completely as he stood making eye contact with the green man leaning on the railing, 

“Funny, according to Hewlett you usually never run out of snarky comments,” Murdoc commented, very amused with the confused and somewhat horrified look on the other man’s face, “Guess there is something we have in common. Go on then, I’ve already said mine.”

At the mention of Jamie’s name, Damon pivoted slowly to see his partner standing a bit behind him, staring wide eyed at the...creature at the bottom of the stairs. 

It was a minute before either man found themselves able to speak up, but Damon finally found the words.

“Uh...you have a nice costume...but we really-“

“Why is it everyone finks we’re wearing costumes all of a sudden?” 2D piped up, causing Damon and Jamie to finally take notice of his presence just below them. 

Jamie, who’d slowly eased his way closer to Damon, peaked over the railing, coming eye to eye with the blue haired man. 

“They think we’re dressed up as Gorillaz, D. Not something they aren’t familiar with, seems to be popular with our fans, but you think they’d recognize they’re own creation when it looked them in their own bloody eyes,” Murdoc explained to him, taunting the very distraught men in the process. 

The bassist glanced towards the back door where Noodle was standing leaned against the glance. The woman glanced up at the two men and slowly backed out of the building, slipping away unnoticed.

“So I’m going to...entertain this for a minute long enough to ask where my demos are?” Damon asked, a small chuckle leaving his lips making the man sound a bit hysterical.

“They’re in safe place, mate. If it makes you feel any better I’m sure they’ll be hits once we’re done with em’,” Murdoc answered, a fake comforting tone present in his voice. One which, of course, did not comfort the other man at all. 

“I beg your pardon?” Jamie asked. 

“Yeah, Muds said all we gotta do is play all those instruments we took on the track and everyfing’ll be done,” 2D said. 

“This isn’t real...this isn’t real...I’m done, where are the cameras?” Damon mumbled to himself, rubbing his temples and pacing along the top of the stairs. 

“The more you say it doesn’t make it true man,” Russel said, rounding the corner and carrying a bag with what they assumed to be the aforementioned instruments. 

The drummer stood a bit behind his bandmates, leaving himself against the exit before glancing up at Jamie and Damon. 

Sure enough, Russel’s eyes appeared white and lit up much of the otherwise dark room. Something that, along with their general unease, proved to the men that the three in front of them were who they were claiming to be. 

“How?...This isn’t...I-,” Damon stuttered but couldn’t seem to get a coherent thought out. 

“I thought you said no one be here this late, especially not them,” Russel spoke up, narrowing his eyes at the two men above them. 

“Well, it just so happens that Hewlett here was having some...”technical difficulties” with his drawing equipment or whatever and they decided it be best to call an electrician after the office closed.”

“You wouldn’t happen to have something to do with that would you?” Jamie asked, raising an eyebrow towards the bassist. 

“Of course not...err...well at least not directly. I can’t be bothered with messing up your little portraits, but I’d bet all of us existing outside of your little universe at the moment might have something to do with it.”

“This still doesn’t explain why you’ve taken my demos...” Damon chimed in, finally seeming to have a grasp on his words...and his sanity. 

“Come on, Albarn. You’re smarter than this, yeah.”

“What are you on about?”

“Nothing at all. Just surprised all that money you’ve made off of OUR band has yet to buy you a bigger brain. We’d be happy to donate to the cause, but unfortunately, we don’t exactly have the funds to do so, but that’s where your lovely demos come in.”

“We’ll help then. We can find a way to get you...back wherever you were.”

“And let you keep taking our money? I don’t fink so,” 2D snarled and crossed his arms, looking more menacing in person than either man thought he could’ve. 

“We aren’t taking anything. We’re the ones doing the actual work and you know it,” Jamie huffed. 

“Well it sure feels like we’ve been working just as hard,” Russel said. 

“Although, I do appreciate you getting a nice start on this for us. Makes our job less stressful.” Sarcasm continuing to lace his voice, the bassist watched the other man’s face flush with anger as he waved one of the demo tapes he’d been keeping in his coat pocket in front of him. 

“I wasn’t helping you with anything. They’re MY demos.” 

“They’re Gorillaz demos. And last I recall I am the leader of said band.”

“They’re not yours. You’re not real,” Damon 

“Well I’m standing here, aren’t I?” Murdoc challenged. He reached into his pocket, grabbing a small piece of paper and flicking it at Damon, hitting him in the face and causing him to flinch, “I assume you felt that. Seems real enough to me.”

“This is theft! You can’t just take them that’s illegal.”

“Oh please, I’ve got a criminal record longer than this staircase. And besides, what cop is gonna go investing for two men who said they were robbed by cartoon characters.” 

“It doesn’t even matter, we’re not letting you leav-“

The man was interrupted by the sound of a engine revving from outside. Through the window they could see Noodle atop a motorcycle, a bag of what Damon could only assume were his demos wrapped around her, waving to Murdoc. 

“Well it’s been lovely talking with you two. Wouldn’t mind doing it again some time, but I’m afraid we’ve got some...prior engagements to attend.”

“Hey! You can’t leave with that!”

“Watch me!” 

Russel shoved the door he’d been leaning against open, holding it open as Murdoc and 2D hurriedly rushed out, closing it just as Damon and Jamie began scurrying down the stairs after them. 

“I hotwired that car there,” Noodle called to the men as they approached her, motioning to a large SUV parked a few feet away. 

“Here take this,” Murdoc said, handing her the last demo, “Hewlet and Albarn’ll be out any minute. Even if they manage to snag everything else we got we’re not letting them anywhere near these tapes, got it?”

“Got it,” Russel replied, hopping on the motorcycle in front of Noodle. 

“I didn’t know you could drive one of these fings Russ,” 2D commented. 

“There’s a lot I do that no one knows...or at least pays attention to,” Russel admitted, “but that’s for another time. Now you two should hurry before Damon and Jamie make it to their cars.”

Murdoc nodded in agreement. He turned on his heel to head towards the SUV before letting out a hiss. 

“What now?” Noodle sighed. 

“It’s my bloody toe. Told you I was injured...”

“How are you gonna drive?”

“I can drive,” 2D offered, excitement in his voice. 

His bandmates all turned to look at him slowly, their expressions portraying a mix of amusement and horror. 

“What? I took classes and everyfing...”

“D, those were all in a classroom with a VR headset. Can you actually SEE the road?” Noodle interrogated. 

“Well...I am seeing a bit better since we’ve been out here...still not great though,” the blue haired man mumbled. 

“That’s dangerous.”

“What choice do we have?” Murdoc sighed, “trust me I’m not thrilled about it either. I’m the one in the bloody car with him. My own life’s at stake.”

The sounds of two car engines erupted from the other end of the lot, interrupting the groups discussion. 

“That’s Damon and Jamie,” Russel said, looking over his shoulders towards the direction of the approaching headlights. 

Noodle sighed and tossed 2D the keys to the car. 

“Do. Not. Crash.” She said, almost threateningly, before reaching around Russel, holding on as he sped off in the direction of the road. 

“If you do just make sure neither of us dies. I’m too young and you make us money,” Murdoc groaned, limping past him towards the vehicle, the sounds of Jamie and Damon’s cars getting louder as they approached.

**Author's Note:**

> I’ve already got most of the next chapter done, which is much longer than this one, so hopefully it won’t be TOO long til I update next.


End file.
